Date:         Wed, 7 Aug 1996 21:29:37 EST
From: gilbertsmith <gsmith@social.chass.ncsu.edu>
Subject:      My Sensitized Earlobes And Above
To: Multiple recipients of list WORDS-L <words-l@uga.cc.uga.edu>

So the home front is calmer and everyone is getting mellow in the
final stages of cleaning out the good things from the house and
leaving the trash and trashy....  So I agree that daughter Karla
should take the dorm refrigerator from the garage and I agree to go
dig it out from behind the other stuff.

I pull out a couch and am suddenly surrounded by buzzing creatures.
One of them--a hornet, I think--finds its way to my ear lobe, buzzes
in the most deafening way and then crawls inside my ear.  I'm like
sh*t oh f*ck oh oh oh....  I slap and flip and try to get it out of
my ear and finally manage to but not before it has done its dirty
work.  I have been stung by an angry hornet inside my ear.  I am
going to die, I'm sure.

I go in the house, splash cold water on it, then grab the vinegar
bottle which fortunately has not yet been purloined away, and pour
vinegar on a tattered kitchen towel and jam it in my ear.  The
*sister*, who has a Ph.D. in pharmacology or something like it
recommends an antihistamine and assures me that I will not die but
that my ear will swell up to five times its normal size and press on
my brain and I will hurt.  Then the MEotM finds an old army first aid
kit from her army days and finds some bee sting stuff, which I put on
the injured <part> and it feels better.  She has, as one of her final
acts, made it better.  My heart is warm.  All is forgiven.

Stay.  Don't leave.  Unload the truck.  Take care of me.
It takes so little to make me happy.
--ggs